While studying in 2 Nephi 28, I was stuck by verse 32. It says, "Wo be unto the Gentiles, saith the Lord God of Hosts! For notwithstanding I shall lengthen out mine arm unto them from day to day, they will deny me; nevertheless, I will be merciful unto them, saith the Lord God, if they will repent and come unto me; for mine arm is lengthened out all the day long, saith the Lord God of Hosts."
     Upon reading this verse I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the mercy of the Lord. Just as the Gentiles, I have often denied His hand, yet in spite of all that He has still extended it. As I have repented and come unto Him, He has never withheld forgiveness or withdrawn His love for me. He has truly been merciful.
      I would like to add that this mercy is not there for just me or even just a few of us, and it is not only there for a set period of time in this life. Even when we deny Him He does not leave us. He is always ready to extend mercy, we simply have to reach for it and accept it. I know this doctrine to be true because I have experienced it many times. I have felt the presence of His hand every time I have reached for it. He is ever ready to bring us back to Him, to strengthen us in times of struggle, and to pull us out of sin with his merciful arms.

     In my personal study of the Book of Mormon this past week I studied 2 Nephi 26. I had a lot of thoughts and insights throughout the whole chapter, but I want to focus on verse 24 because it is incredible to me. It says, "He doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world, even that he layeth down his own life that he may draw all men unto him. Wherefore, he commandeth none that they shall not partake of his salvation."
     This verse is speaking of our Savior, Jesus Christ. What struck me about it most is that Christ doesn't do anything unless it benefits us. More than that, anything He does is out of the unfathomable love He has for us. He laid down His life, so that we could rise from the grave. He atoned, so that our spirits could rise from their spiritual grave.
      I know these doctrines to be true. I personally know that Christ loves me so much and because I know that I also know that I can come to Him in time of weakness and trial. I know that He perfectly understands because He made the ultimate sacrifice and I know that I have been and continue to be blessed by a truly loving Savior, but even further than knowing these things of Christ, we can and should directly apply this knowledge to our actions.We have been commanded of Christ to partake of His salvation. We should take this commandment very seriously and with the utmost sacredness. When we need Him we should come unto Him with a humble heart and seek for healing, comfort, forgiveness, peace, and so on. I would exhort that we all seek Christ and utilize His gift of salvation.

In my study of the Book of Mormon this past week, I studied 2 Nephi 4. The entire chapter really struck me, but I would just like to share a few verses.

In verses 27-30 it says,"27 And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?

28 Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul.

29 Do not anger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.

30 Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation."

I was so grateful to read these. They were very thought provoking questions and responses for me personally and can be for all of us if we really take them to heart. Why do we give in to sin.. why are we angry.. why are we doing and being all those things contrary to the commandments of God and giving way to Satan? We do not have to yield to the devil. We don't have to become angry or sad. We too can waken our souls, we can rejoice and be glad, we can choose to do the right and to withstand temptations. We do not have to remain in a state of anger, sin, or weakness. It is a choice each and every one of us have in every single moment and situation. We can always choose the better way and we can always choose to be happy. Though I understand that we all have imperfections and won't be perfect in this life, I know that if we make a conscious effort to rejoice in the Lord as Nephi does, if we trust in Him, follow Him, and make Him our rock and foundation we can feel the spirit awake our souls from a state of despair and sorrow and sin. I have personally been very grateful for that choice as I have faced/face difficult times. I have felt that joy come from my Savior, my soul has been awakened and I testify, once again, that we all have the choice to feel that as well.

Opposition in all things

During this past week of my class Jesus Christ and The Everlasting Gospel we discussed several principles and doctrines, but one that really stuck out to me is illustrated in the passage Moses 1:1-22. These verses tell of Moses's beautiful experience with God while he was on a high mountain and of the following encounter he had with Satan. Upon discussing this, our professor pointed out that Moses had had a "spiritual plateau" as he referred to it. He had felt an abundance of the spirit as he viewed God's creations and the grandness of the universe. When he returned from this he was confronted by Satan with an extremely evil and opposite power. Our professor said that Brigham Young taught, "Whenever God gives you a very high, holy, or sacred experience either right before or right after he is going to allow the devil to tempt you or he himself will give you a trial equal and opposite in proportion to what you just experienced." Moses's experience and this quote instantly reminded me of several of my own personal struggles and spiritual highs that I had gone through recently. In recognition of those experiences, I was humbled, and it caused me to realize that I need to prepare myself now for those struggles ahead. Moses, though he felt fear and a struggle to oppose Satan, did not falter because he had prepared himself spiritually and followed the will and counsel of Heavenly Father. Our professor told us, "Don't beat yourself up when you struggle after you've had amazing spiritual experiences... let you grow through them instead of go through them." Just as Moses all of those who do experience a very spiritual high will at some point face the opposite amount of struggle or trial. We must all do what we can to prepare ourselves against those times. We must make decisions now to follow our Heavenly Father, to endure and press forward, and to allow hard times to help us grow and progress. I am grateful for both trials and spiritual experiences. I know that they are the means to growth in this glorious gospel. How we face both types of experiences will determine which way we go and who we will follow.

In my Book of Mormon class this last week, we discussed the scripture Moroni 7:45, "And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things." After reading this scripture, our professor told us to replace the word charity with Christ. All these things that describe what charity is, describe who Christ is. He went on to say that charity is not something that we can have without Christ. Charity is the “pure love of Christ” and because of that, we can become charitable through Him. As we take in the love which our Savior gives to us, it is through Him by which we are enabled to reflect that love and extend it to those around us. Without Christ, true charity is not possible. Christ really is the only truly charitable person to ever live, he was and is charity. Even when Christ was on the cross He prayed these words of charity, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” This insight caused me to really reflect on how true of a disciple of Christ I am. It’s so easy to love someone and treat them with kindness when life is going well, but how do we do when times are at their worst in our own personal lives, do we extend our hand in Christlike love to others? This is the true test of a disciple of Christ. May we all strive to look to the Savior to receive charity for others in all circumstances. I am so grateful for the role Christ plays in our lives and I know that He will come to our aid and give us true charity if we look to Him for that love.

This past week in class, we discussed the story of the Brother of Jared. We specifically talked about Jared as he had to prepare the barges to cross the ocean. There were several problems with the boats and in Ether 2:19 he prays to Heavenly Father saying “And behold, O Lord, in them there is no light; whither shall we steer? And also we shall perish, for in them we cannot breathe, save it is the air which is in them; therefore we shall perish.” In the following verses, Heavenly Father gives him answers to each of these problems in three ways. The first way He answered was by telling Jared, “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it,” just as He did with the steering of the barges. The second way He answered was by giving step by step instructions as He did with solving the problem of no air. Then the third way He was by letting Jared choose how to solve a problem just as He did with the problem of no light in the barges. We can always be assured that God will answer us. He will always answer us in one of these ways every time we ask Him for an answer to problems we are facing, but, most often, He will answer by letting us choose what we will do to solve the problem, in turn, giving us an opportunity for more growth and change. By doing this He shows us the importance of agency; that it is truly a gift. If, whenever we were faced with a problem and He gave us a direct answer either by telling us what to do or by saying, “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it,” we would not learn, and our hearts would not change. Overall, we could not become like Christ.

  In our discussion is class this past week, we went over 3 Nephi 13:16 which says, “Moreover, when ye fast be not as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance, for they disfigure their faces that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, they have their reward. But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thy head, and wash thy face; That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father, who is in secret; and thy Father, who seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.” This lesson on fasting was a good reminder to me on how I should be on fast Sunday. I often worry more about my physical body being fed than my spirit. Our professor reminded us to look at fast Sunday as a day we can learn to fight against those things we seek after according to the flesh and to learn to let our spirit control our appetites and instead feed its hunger. He also compared this to learning to control our lusts and other worldly desires as we go throughout the rest of the month. Fast Sunday really is a wonderful opportunity to strengthen our spirit and to put off the natural man. We should really be joyful instead of fasting with “a sad countenance”. This opportunity we have to fast each month can really be an amazing way to fill our souls with The Living Water and the Bread of Life, Jesus Christ. Heavenly Father will reward us, as it states in the scripture, if we come unto Him to fast and fast not unto men.